While working on an article about Teaching About Prayer with software for my sundaysoftware.com website, –and complaining about teachers and pastors who use prayer to summarize their lesson/sermon, …I had a bunch of thoughts and experiences flood back into memory about “The Pastoral Prayer” we lead or hear in worship.
Having led many “Pastoral Prayers” over the years in several churches, I think it’s one of the most CHALLENGING parts of worship, and one that need improvement. Honestly, I never felt quite comfortable delivering it because I didn’t have a really good “Holy Joe” voice. I’ve always felt that prayer was something more personal, and less “speechy.” And as a “pastor in the pew” I’ve listened with some inside experience to a lot of other pastor’s Pastoral Prayers.
Having come at it from both directions, and tried many tweaks, I offer these insights and suggestions with the hope of stimulating your own.
Here are 8 “problems” with the Pastoral Prayer and the Pastor who delivers them, and suggestions for change.
1. The Audacity of thinking one person or one prayer can pray for a whole group of people, and meet their needs.
I’ve often mentioned this “audacity” to congregations, both before and during the prayer, and occasionally in a sermon. This helps them (and me) with our expectations, and gives permission to change. Many have a rigid idea of the correct form of the prayer. I’ve told them some of the things on my mind, and let them know if I was going to leave space for their silent prayers (such a concept!). I’ve mentioned to them that when I pause, it’s not because I’ve lost my place, but because I’m leaving space for their thoughts. They like that.
In particular, I’ve found it helpful expand on ideas such as, “Lord, how should we speak to you?” “How can we pretend to speak when we have failed to listen?” “What words suffice when our hearts are heavy with…”
One of the most well-received forms I’ve used is what I call “The Pause Prayer.” I tell the congregation that I’m going to introduce an idea, and then CUE them to pause to let them think about it in their own prayer, then after 10 seconds, move on saying “Lord, hear our prayer.” I’m sure you’ve experienced some form of this prayer.
Sometimes you see these “Pause Prayers” written in the program as litanies. I’m not a huge fan of litanies, because reading doesn’t feel like praying. Too many litanies sound like sermons, or worse, –the prayer writer’s attempt to impress people with their Holy Joe skills. Even litanies with space for silent prayer often leave people looking at the printed text and wondering when the pastor is going to start up again.
(Note to pastors: When you put us “in the mello mood of silent prayer, don’t burst-in over the microphone with a loud voice. SOFTLY cue us back into listening.)
2. The TUG between the “Holy Joe” language of public prayer-leading versus the heart-felt ramblings of personal prayer.
From time to time I have written out the prayer using no “Holy” words, instead using common language to express the same idea. It has taught me to keep it real. It sounds more authentic and makes prayer-as-something-I-should-do-more-often more accessible to the average worshipper. I’ve also slowed-down and let silence fall between ideas in my spoken prayer… to let the people feel the comment, process it, and converse with it. Pastoral Prayers should not be speeches.
“Holy” language can backfires on our intent. We want our people to pray, but if we set the “language bar” for prayer too far above the average person’s verbal level, we are undermining their feeling of adequacy. Flowery prayer sound powerful to some, but it has also taught generations of people to be stiff and formal in their own prayers, or left them not praying at all because they feel inadequate. (And you see the effect when the pastor asks someone else to lead a prayer… the comfort level and language ain’t there.)
TRUTH: One of the reasons pastors fall back on “holy language” is because it’s easier to write “holy” prayers, than heart-felt. And pastors often leave the pastoral prayer to Sunday morning’s preparation when they are busy polishing the sermon and doing countless other things. This is one of the reasons the “preacher” should not lead the pastoral prayer. Or at least, should focus on it prior to Sunday morning.
BTW… I think the Pastoral Prayer should be written out, and not extemporaneous. Meaningful ad-libbing is fine, but when you’re praying for a group, you have a responsibility not to get tongue-tied or have brain-freeze. Writing out the prayer will also help you avoid boilerplate Holy Joe prayer language that you fall back on when your brain infarcts!
3. The Lack of Variety when one person is the regular prayer leader.
Pastoral Prayers should not always be led by the pastor! That’s not what “pastoral” means. Elders should be invited to pray, and perhaps should be taught in a “pastoral prayer workshop” once a year. There are books of prayers, and many online sites with new prayers submitted from many different traditions. MINE them.
4. The “Exhausted Pastor Syndrome”...having to lead the prayer after a lengthy exhausting sermon.
Take my word for it… after a sermon, the preacher’s mind is exhausted and still whirling. Therefore, either a) Find help to do the prayer, or b) put several worship items between the sermon and the prayer in the program. And if you ARE that exhausted pastor, have your pastoral prayer written out ahead of time, otherwise you’ll fall back on Holy language and platitudes.
5. The Pastoral Prayer Shopping List. “The form” we have been taught goes like this: Praise to, Thanksgiving for, prayers about the world, the community, and lastly us. It’s too much. It turns the prayer into a check-list.
There is no rule that a pastoral prayer has to start off with praise and thanksgiving. You can go right to the personal stuff. While these other elements are important, other parts of the worship service can (and do) deal with them. Give TIME to subjects in your prayer. Rather than viewing your pastoral prayer as a “catch all”, let other parts of the service carry some of the weight. View the service content in an integrated fashion, rather than as separate items with their own agendas.
6. The Horror of Things Left Out. …the pastoral prayer as lip-service to the disaster of the day, impending holiday, or other noteworthy event one must mention. Failure to mention it will certain mean it gets mentioned to you at the end of the service! Create a practice where you invite people to submit suggestions for the prayer. And then always look at your calendar and the morning paper before writing your prayer. Doesn’t hurt to check CNN or your text messages and email. Make a habit of inviting prayer concerns prior to the beginning of worship.
(I’m NOT a huge fan of inviting prayer requests DURING worship. Inevitably a few people dominate, and many who won’t speak in public won’t share in public either. It also takes too much time in worship. Sad, but true.)
7. The Pastoral Prayer as Sermon Summary. In a word, “don’t“. IMHO… Using the prayer to summarize the sermon is the worst thing that can happen to the pastoral prayer. “Touch on” a key point or allude to something, yes, –but recap? No! If your sermon isn’t memorable enough without including it in the pastoral prayer, you have a sermon problem.
8. The Adrenaline-Rushed Pastor speeding through the prayer.
Three things:
a) Cut your prayer word count, then you won’t have to rush.
b) Start the pastoral prayer with silent prayer, and remember to pray yourself (for one thing it lowers your heartrate).
c) Let someone else do the pastoral prayer.
Many speakers, including many pastors, are unaware of the SPEED at which they pray. Some whip through the Praises. Some whip through it all! At a church where I attended as a “pastor in the pew” every Sunday the Senior Pastor would lead us on a nice & slow pastoral prayer, then WHIP THROUGH the Lord’s Prayer. He was like a horse headed to the barn. You could actually hear him AHEAD of the congregation pulling us through the Lord’s Prayer. The problem: he had put us all in a mello mood during the prayer, then he got prefunctory with the Lord’s Prayer and sped up. Word to the pastor…. step back from the microphone after you start the Lord’s Prayer. Let the congregation lead it.
9. ________________ This one is left open for your struggle and solution.
<>< Neil
See my article about, Tips on Teaching Children to Pray and Using Software to Teach Children to Pray
www.sundaysoftware.com/lessons/prayer.htm
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